12 March 2010

Only her hairstylist knows for sure

I had a hair appointment after work yesterday afternoon. The older I get, the longer it takes to keep my hair looking presentable. Well, the actual appointment time itself is about the same; that is, the magical hair transformation process hasn’t changed. My own commitment time has increased because procrastinating on getting my hair done, while formerly just a minor annoyance, now results in some really bad hair days. Not pretty. So I have to keep on top of the appointment schedule. No stretching from 6 to 7 weeks anymore.

The process is somewhat time consuming and at this particular business location, on a late afternoon, no one else is present. Just the stylist and me. So we talk for a couple of hours. About family, recipes, death, relationships, entertaining, shopping, love, hurt, faith, heritage.

We share an amazing amount of information for two people that only see each other about 8 times per year.

I was there the afternoon that she received the telephone call with the news her father had died. I remember watching the numbness steal over her as she held the phone.

She was the first person I told that my former spouse had left me. She remembered how she felt when her own marriage ended in similar circumstances and she understood. She had no judgement.

I spend 8 hours per day in close proximity to a half dozen or so people here in my office. I love my employer and I admire the competence of my colleagues. But I do not have anything approximating the feeling of confidentiality with my colleagues that I do with my hair stylist.

So what’s up with that? There is definitely substance to that old saying about hairstylists.

12 comments:

  1. Yeah, why is this always the case? Maybe something about our hair and what an intimate part of us it really is.

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  2. I feel the exact same way about mine. Of course, I shave my head by myself.

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  3. I always wished for this relationship with a hairstylist. And then realized that when you get your hair cut once a year, and always at different places, it's just not possible. You gotta do your part in making your dreams come true, right? :)

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  4. so true, I would not even be friends with my hairdresser outside of her shop. We are two differant people with differant ideals about just about everything, but in her chair we really talk to one another. Loved this post. And also, thank you so much for the extra sweet note that you left me. I really enjoyed your 5 words too.

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  5. I was a hairdresser for many yars. And yes, they really are therapists of sorts. I haven't been in the biz for twenty or so years, but one of my former clients is still one of my best friends to this day.

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  6. It is so interesting how a true trust and camaraderie develops between relative strangers. As a person and as a writer, I love this. I love that we can interact, really interact, with people who aren't our proper friends and family. I love that we can learn from, and confide in, people who don't play huge roles in our lives. This reminds me of blogging... Isn't it amazing that we share so much so quickly with people whom we don't see from day to day?

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  7. It's like me and the mixologist.

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  8. What a wonderful reflection on a phenomenon that seems so widespread. I haven't had my hair cut in almost a year, but I too wish for this sort of open relationship with a would-be stranger. Leslie @ Fivetonine wrote a similar post recently that you might like to read: http://fivetonine.wordpress.com/2010/03/11/talking-to-strangers/

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  9. You just never know where we end up connecting. Sometimes its the hair stylist, a co-worker, at the gym etc. Connections are powerful and keep us going!

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  10. I have no reference to this....haven't any hair for the past 10 years or so......(but is saves me a lot of shampoo and barber bills.

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